Chasing the Rainbow Ends

By Eric - 4:31 PM


Most of my blog posts here are so gloomy and sad, knowing that no matter how beautiful life is, there is always sadness and loneliness behind all of those smiling and laughing.
I'm not trying to be so melodramatic and gathering some sympathies, but that's how the way it is. I'm not sad nor lonely because I was born that way but the way the cookie crumbles  that worries me. 
Been stuck in the four corners of a box since I arrived last July last year and nothing happens that is so worthy to brag about.
I found it so funny that there're a lot of invitations and job offers abroad so as possible signs that they could be a good bread & butter to hope upon, yet, in the long run of the process things slowly faded away and none of them have contacted me back. Just as my hope of getting a sign from above has vanishing too.



Have this weird thought that God has played a pun on me not just to test me but to be looked like a looser and idiot so to speak. I have been so vocal and frank telling of my ill-feelings towards my creator because of the opposite of what I expected to be. Chasing rainbows, spinning dreams: getting tired of chasing pretty rainbows and getting tired of spinning round and around.
My fear, that my dreams may remain as dreams, as it would no longer be seen but a shattered dreams. Toiling time seems so endless that my single heart is no longer rejoicing as my days are always doom to nothing.
As I always close my eyes in slumber, the agony of asking questions, will there be any chances to come when an evening the sun going down? Haplessly, I guess none.


(Disclaimer: Photos taken from Google search)

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