Moments of Crisis

Life could be so difficult when you are in a moment of life's confrontation. One is never fighting against an external enemy but always against one's own body.

(images courtesy of Google)

When the going gets tough, emotion runs high and usually moods seems to be so unpredictable. Crisis uncontrollably  started to come out like (a) mushroom when I got home from Europe. Things have messed up as I didn't expect that life could be so hard here in my own country than abroad, monetarily.
Four months were eventually the longest span of my stay in the Philippines as planned, but as we may say it, "Sometimes things didn't go as planned" & that sulk me. I didn't have much with me when I got home from Poland as I'm honestly not a moneyed person by nature. Neither, would I consider myself a spendthrift nor a compulsive spender when I reward myself to travel.
I never travel on posh but on a budgeted way, however, proven to be- money would probably runs dry. Sadly, none from the jobs that I have had formally applied to showed any positive signs that I could possibly fly anytime soon.

(images courtesy of Google)

Nevertheless, its not the end of the world yet, and the battle of life hasn't over. What am I just simply hoping for was that I could retain the instinct of survival while battling the odds of life.
I still have two more formal interviews this month, & if these two won't work well, much to my regret, I have to fly rightly for Cambodia before February comes.
Good heavens, that I've got friends  scattered around the part of South east Asia , worries has no place at all when I need a roof to shelter myself overseas. To say the least, I'm grateful for my friends who open their doors in times I needed a warm place to stay by & for feeding me when I don't have something to put upon on my plate. They just acting on their own without waiting for me to tell the essential needs that I long for.
Don't you think I'm being rather melodramatic? Like treats a situation as much more serious that it really is? Well, be in my shoes. Occasionally, this crisis have thought me of singing this song:

I open my eyes

I try to see but I'm blinded by the white light.

I can’t remember how

I can’t remember why

I'm laying here tonight

And I can’t STAND the pain

And I can’t make it go away

No I can’t STAND the pain

*CHORUS*

How could this happen to me

I've made my mistakes

got nowhere to run

The night goes on as I’m fading away

I'm sick of this life

I just wanna scream

How could this happen to me

Everybody’s screaming

I try to make a sound but no one hears me

I’m slipping off the edge

I’m hanging by a thread

I wanna start this over again

So I try to hold

On to a time when 

Nothing mattered

And I can’t explain what happened

And I can’t erase the things that I’ve done

No I can’t

*CHORUS*

How could this happen to me

I've made my mistakes

got nowhere to run

The night goes on as I’m fading away

I’m sick of this life

I just wanna scream

How could this happen to me

I've made my mistakes

got nowhere to run

The night goes on as I’m fading away

I’m sick of this life

I just wanna scream

How could this happen to me